We Stand On Guard

From before Confederation and to this day… This family stands on guard.

The Eclectic Poet

Since before Confederation, The American Revolution, The Boer War, The War of 1812, First World War, Second World War, Korea. On land, on sea, in air – my family has been proud to serve, fight and die for this country and yours. I wish I could honour all of them with a photo or a word or two. I’ll settle with the simplest and the most heartfelt.
Thank you.

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Why, Yes! Since You Asked

Something that I’ve noticed when well-intentioned friends and family offer to help “Spoonie” me:

Those offers are more appreciated than you know; the tricky part is the follow through.

I often hear “you never asked!” or “I didn’t know what you needed” or “Wish I could but that day doesn’t work”.

It totally changes the dynamic from someone understanding that you need assistance and making that happen and you being put in the position of asking a favour, two very different things.

Here’s the thing: as a formerly vivacious, uber-capable person, it kills me to ask for help. I never have, not from my parents, not from anyone. My self-esteem as a fully functioning adult is pretty beaten up already.

If you genuinely want to help, having a take charge attitude is incredibly helpful to someone like me. It shows me that you have the time and willingness. It tells me that I’m not cutting in to your personal or family time. It makes me feel that I still have value and am not burdening you.

There are so many things that you can do without being asked that improve quality of life for “Spoonies”:

Offer to help get garbage to the curb

Shovel out a walkway; lend your green thumb for some gardening

Drop off a casserole; send Skip the Dishes gift cards

Help with organizing files, cupboards, closets

Splurge on a house cleaning service gift card, it takes the embarrassment of an untidy out of the mix

Offer to help picking up groceries or shopping or send complimentary Uber / Lyft rides

Splurge on paraffin manicures or pedicures for friends with arthritis or fibro

Doing these things spontaneously, offering them at any time rather waiting to be asked is huge for me. A friend who also understands that sometimes shit just gotta get done and that every visit doesn’t need to be or should be a social event is golden. I want to see you, need to be connected to people who know who I was but every once in a while, if you could throw on a Super Hero cape, that’d be amaze-balls!

No one wants to feel indebted, least of all the people in your life who for whatever reason may not be able to reciprocate in kind. There are so many other things that I or we can still do to enhance or enrich friendships, all you need to do is be there and really mean it.

Xoxo, Karin

~ kei
29 October 2018

With Heartfelt Gratitude

This is one of my earliest posts about Remembrance Day.
I am reposting as my thoughts expressed here stand and sadly, nothing has changed except perhaps that “Lest We Forget” has now become “The World’s Biggest Shopping Day is now 11/11” and “11/11 isn’t just for Singles anymore!”
Service men and women fought for our right to freedom, not for our right to shop. Show some respect. Wear a poppy, stand for the two minutes, pull over, stop your damn car and be grateful that someone had the courage to make the sacrifice for you and your future.

The Eclectic Poet

“He is not missing, He is here”

~ Field Marshal Lord Plumer at the unveiling of the Menin Gate Memorial to the Missing 24th July 1927

~~~~~

I am the first generation in my family that hasn’t served, fought or died for this country…

It’s not a big deal, something that gets talked about alot. Just something I noticed about a decade ago while working on a November 11th project with the kids.

When it comes to mind lately, the thought is even more poignant…

Some of the children who went to school at the same time, who made the construction paper poppies and sang John Lennon’s  “Give Peace A Chance” at the Remembrance Day assembly –  “my kids” – are part of the Canadian Forces currently in Afghanistan.

Boggles the mind. The “War To End All Wars” has come and gone and still, the world fights on.

I doubt that…

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With Heartfelt Gratitude

“He is not missing, He is here”

~ Field Marshal Lord Plumer at the unveiling of the Menin Gate Memorial to the Missing 24th July 1927

~~~~~

I am the first generation in my family that hasn’t served, fought or died for this country…

It’s not a big deal, something that gets talked about alot. Just something I noticed about a decade ago while working on a November 11th project with the kids.

When it comes to mind lately, the thought is even more poignant…

Some of the children who went to school at the same time, who made the construction paper poppies and sang John Lennon’s  “Give Peace A Chance” at the Remembrance Day assembly –  “my kids” – are part of the Canadian Forces currently in Afghanistan.

Boggles the mind. The “War To End All Wars” has come and gone and still, the world fights on.

I doubt that anyone my age truly believes that there’ll be a time when there is no more war. It’s a sad and unfortunate truth that the world has become more violent, the rhetoric more virulent and the willful blindness and stupidity just never changed at all.

My hope for Remembrance Day is that in speaking openly about the human face of war, by celebrating the huge victories for peace and freedom that past generations won and supporting the people who continue fighting for all of us today; we’ll  all remember that the simple, sometimes mundane reality of our everyday lives is actually a gift.

That people just like us, left everything they hold dear, fought, were wounded and died. It crystallizes the concept of one person making a difference and how when all those individuals consolidate their efforts for such an honourable cause, just how much can be achieved.

Look around you Canada, the spirit of Remembrance Day is with us every day.

Great Great Grandpa Carey James Tupper – The Boer War

Great Grandpa Carey Tupper – killed in action 2 June 1916, WWI, Ypres

Great Grandpa Thomas Howell Thomas – wounded in action 1917, WWI, Passchendaele

Great Grandpa James Harris Thorpe – Canadian Merchant Marine WWII, Atlantic Theatre

Great Uncle Bill Thorpe – Canadian Merchant Marine WWII, Atlantic Theatre

Great Auntie Jean – 2nd Lieutenant during World War Two, Commemorative Medal of the Confederation of Canada

Great Uncle Clayton Thorpe – Canadian Armed Forces WWII, Italy, France, Belgium, liberation of Germany

My Dad Earl C. Tupper – Canadian Armed Forces

Grandpa William C. Collins – Canadian Air Force and Corps of Engineers, WWII

Thank you to “My Kids”, Canadian Armed Forces, currently serving in Afghanistan. I won’t call you out here but I better see you soon!

Carey Judson Tupper. Panel 30 & 32

Carey Judson Tupper. Panel 30 & 32

We Stand On Guard

Since before Confederation, The American Revolution, The Boer War, The War of 1812, First World War, Second World War, Korea. On land, on sea, in air – my family has been proud to serve, fight and die for this country and yours. I wish I could honour all of them with a photo or a word or two. I’ll settle with the simplest and the most heartfelt.
Thank you.

 

Kei’s Five Beautiful Things ~ 6

In this instant I am perfectly, completely happy.
#keisfivebeautifulthings

These are the things that stopped me – if only for a moment – to really appreciate that moment, in joy, humour, wonder… Five beautiful things.

~ kei
10 September 2015

All photographs are ©Karin Bole Tupper

Kei’s Five Beautiful Things ~ 5

In this instant I am perfectly, completely happy.
#keisfivebeautifulthings

These are the things that stopped me – if only for a moment – to really appreciate that moment, in joy, humour, wonder… Five beautiful things.

~ kei
2 September 2015