Wonderful Wednesday

Not so wordless today 🙂

One of the first things I saw this AM and still making me smile – yes, I’ve watched three times already – I am a crazy Mumma Bear for kids.

WordPress won’t allow the posting of videos on plebeian blogs like mine so I posted it over on my Blogger site. It’ll be worth your finger twitch for the smile. Promise.

Happy Dancing Wednesday

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The Dance

Breathless…

The rhythm of the dance entrances still, tiny feet that seek the music’s will. Two bodies caught in pas de deux, I am she, and he is you.

Surrender to the music, beloved let go. This time and space is all we’ll know. Two bodies move in perfect time, mine in yours, yours in mine…

~ kei
11 June 2014

Do not fear the storm. It is as necessary as the sun.

Do not fear the storm. It is as necessary as the sun.

Thinner

I’ve been sick for quite a while now.

Bodies are amazing things, both in the way they can perform such incredible feats and in the way they can be their own weapon of mass destruction.
As I’m slowly making a recovery, I can see that I’ve lost weight. Not a huge amount, perhaps 10 pounds. It shows in the loss of my cheeks and breasts mostly. I don’t like the thinness of my face, It makes me look old I think. I am feeling a somewhat perverse pleasure at seeing the reemergence of my hipbones and being able to fasten my bra one hook tighter.

I was a ballerina when I was younger.

I suffered from anorexia, or if the truth be told, I had a love affair with anorexia. It is after all, that bar to pass for so many dancers. The less of me there was, the more ethereal I felt. Every cigarette, every cup of black coffee brought me closer to my ideal and I loved that pas de deux with my twisted perception. Many things helped me to recover eventually. Love, maturity, injury that meant teaching and not The Corps, a wish for children.

I must admit a truth though.

As the pounds fall away, it feels like my body had become its own archaeologist. Working from the inside out, using tools with Latin names. Delicately chipping, digging, brushing away… the accumulated layers of me. I like seeing the long-buried bones of the ballerina emerge and the feeling that…

I’m finally getting to the core of me.

~ kei
11 December 2013

 

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