From The Diary Of A Lady ~ Two

~ Excerpt 5 May xxxx

This is the private journal of Lady Karin Elizabeth Tupper Bole-ington the Third by Proxy.

At last Dear Diary, I have recovered from the festivities. One finds it hard to believe that not so long ago, soirées lasting into the small hours were the norm at least each fortnight. My daughter, the most beautiful and talented Lady Caitlyn Elizabeth Bole-ington Ghadbanishness of Doom comported herself with customary aplomb, much to the delight of her companion mummers and those in attendance. The Amazing Mummers of M’Alice Cooperson regaled the house with new material in the form of old songs sung by the first troubadour of Cooper, “Alice” himself. It was plain to see that even those long past their lessons, were happy to agree in tuneful form that indeed, the institution of learning is out for summer. I myself Diary, cannot condone the hooliganism of blowing the school to pieces however, I hope this was just the enthusiasm of the moment. The visual extravaganza came off without a hitch and the tavern keep must be well-pleased with this take from the evening. Frivolity and the imbibing of spirits abounded!

I must have been a fright when our carriage dropped me off at my door right at the Witching Hour – how very appropriate! I was bursting with pride at my offspring’s success and mightily pleased that the full body armour extra lycra corsetery of Spanx held through the evening and through my preening like a proud mother peahen.

It is somewhat vexing that the two strong acolytes that should have come with my purchase of particularly lovely high-heeled slippers, did not arrive with said purchase. I shall know to inspect the parcel before wearing them to another venue of no seating, much dancing – though fortunately none of the new-fangled “body surfing”! Henceforth, I will wear my suitable and sensible shoes from the wonderful cobbler Dr. Marten.

It could be said Dear Diary, that performances go smoothly in all aspects and there is a minimum of tomfoolery. In truth, I attend these events to ensure Lady Caitlyn’s virtue. There are many randy lordlings and no lack of lords that I would find rather stale-dated who vie for her affections. I know she finds my presence reassuring and I think I’m most subtle in my approach though I admit, my dexterity with a hockey stick and the posterior of some… less erudite suitors is not always appreciated.  Fortunately, these are infrequent occurrences. Sigh… some people’s offspring. It does provide for much merriment in the “Book Of Faces” that is shared among boroughs and districts far and wide.

The evening’s entertainments included party favours and apparel. I was particularly pleased that Lady Caitlyn’s image is emblazoned upon the chemise heralding the name of the mummers’ troupe along with her stalwart mAlice Cooper compatriots.

©Karin Bole Tupper

Alice Cooper Tribute mALICE & Monsters
They’re on Facebook 🙂

Pleased too, that my “Bridesmaid’s Bound” remains as quick as ever. I was able to obtain, with minimal damage to myself or any masonry, a strange, though cheerfully bright eye patch. I’m sure it will be useful should the next event be a costume ball. How very festive I shall look!

©Karin Bole Tupper

What all the pirates wear!
What? It IS and eye patch right?

And now Dear Diary, I think I have relayed all the evening’s cheer, tomfoolery and good companionship. I must now close and apply a little more salve to the chafe marks left by the corset of Spanx and mayhap place an order with the Apothecary for more Spackle and headache powders…

~ kei (the erstwhile Lady Karin, etc. etc. and I swear I won’t do this to your poor eyes again!)
5 May 2015

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9 thoughts on “From The Diary Of A Lady ~ Two

  1. Bloody hilarious, K – glad to see that you and I frequent the same cobbler! As for the corset – well, in my case, I don’t think they’ve yet invented a whale big enough to produce the bone (fnah, fnah, as Viz has it!) required for MY needs – take that as you will! xxx

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    • It’s hard to believe that just a couple years ago, I was rather a party girl! My uniform usually includes footwear from that fine cobbler (I like mine with flowers) or his sometime challenger, Chuck Taylor of Converse, lol!
      My rallying cry now (to ensure I maintain my parenting credentials) is: Super-spackl-ination and Thunderthighs are go!
      So glad you liked it Ali, I guess I’m outed – my sense of humour is off the wall and out of orbit!

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